If you've worked in an emergency room, chances are you seen some weird stuff (just ask Richard Gere), but here are some one-in-a-million shots that may be the freakiest of the freak accidents you've ever heard of.

 

10) Paintball Ruptures Woman's Breast Implant (2011)

Croydon, England: This is where all that "fine print" in legal disclaimers comes from... Two days after an unnamed 26-year-old woman took part in a friendly outdoor paintball game, she felt some discomfort in her chest and visited a doctor, only to find out that one of her breast implants had been punctured by a paintball pellet. She made a full recovery, and while she didn't sue the paintball company, its terms and conditions now require an acknowledgment by players that they understand that "paintballs can damage/rupture breast implants."

 

9) Axe Flies into Man's Groin (2011)

Christchurch, New Zealand: A man in his 50s attending a woodchopping competition got more than he bargained for when an axe head flew off of a competitor's handle and into the crowd, landing in the man's groin. The axe severed his femoral artery, and he was admitted to the hospital in critical condition but was later reported to be "doing well" (relatively speaking, given the whole groin thing). The event coordinator promised that changes would be made "to ensure such an incident could not happen again." Steel cod pieces for the audience perhaps?

 

8) Teen Impaled by Own Golf Club (1994)

Gloversville, New York: In what's sure to become a cautionary tale for generations to come, Jeremy Brenno, 16, was playing a round of golf at the Kingsboro Golf Club when frustration over a bad shot caused him to hit a nearby bench with his club. The shaft on the 3-wood broke and acted like a spear, flying up into his chest and piercing his heart. He died at the hospital a couple of hours later.

 

7) Woman Breaks Her Back Sneezing (2007)

Chichester, England: When Victoria Kenny, 52, sneezed one day while watching TV, she did so with such force that she ruptured a disc in her spine, temporarily paralyzing her and leaving her with limited movement and constant pain for over a year. She recovered thanks to a cutting-edge surgery, but as can be expected, she lives in constant fear of feathers, pepper and dust bunnies.

 

6) When Bears Fly...They Kill (2011)

Ottawa, Canada: Two people were killed in rural stretch outside of Ottawa when a 400-plus-pound black bear was sent flying into their vehicle after being hit by another car. The 25-year-old female driver and the 40-year-old passenger died instantly, as did the bear.

 

5) "Jolt" Soda (1990)

Miami, Florida: Pony Malta is a syrupy, beer-like Columbian soft drink that, in and of itself, doesn't sound too healthy, but the bottle that Maximo Rene Menendez, 25, drank was downright fatal. That's because it was part of a botched attempt to smuggle cocaine into the US from Columbia. Menendez innocently purchased a bottle that wasn't meant for human consumption -- containing up to 200 times the lethal dose of cocaine -- and within minutes fell into a coma from which he never emerged. Two other contaminated bottles were found in his home, and eight other similarly tainted bottles were found around the Miami area. All were traced back to one particular shipment from Columbia; police were able to account for most of the 1,000 cases, and no other deaths were reported.

 

4) Dog Shoots Man (2010)

Los Banos, California: An unnamed 53-year-old man was duck hunting when he laid his shotgun down to retrieve some decoys. That's when his hunting dog, a black Labrador retriever, not only released the safety, but also somehow pulled the trigger and pointed it precisely enough to strike the hunter in his back and left side. The man recovered, but the dog is doing 20 to life in San Quentin.

 

3) Man Falls Through Window While "Testing" It for Strength (1993)

Toronto, Canada: It sounds like an urban legend, but it actually happened: 38-year-old lawyer Garry Hoy apparently made a habit of leaping against a window on the 24th floor of his office building and bouncing off -- in order to show off, in vivid detail, the window's strength. Having earned an engineering degree before studying law, Hoy knew what he was talking about when he championed the window as being unbreakable; however, the frame was not as sturdy, and on this particular day, it popped out when he flung his weight on it, sending him plummeting to his death.

 

2) Exploding Chair Lodges in Teen's Rectum (2009)

China: A fourteen-year-old boy in an unnamed region of China was reportedly sitting on a computer chair with a pressurized gas cylinder design (for adjusting the height) when the device exploded, sending metal shards into the boy's rectum. He bled to death on the way to the hospital. Supposedly the explosion was caused by "energy created by the seat cushion," calling into question the traditional wisdom that it's beneficial to have more cushion for the pushin'.

 

1) Woman Committing Suicide Falls onto Man (2009)

Viladecans, Spain: A suicidal woman leaped to her death from an eighth-floor balcony, but as (bad) luck would have it, she landed on a 50-year-old passerby who was walking with his wife. The man was seriously injured and died shortly thereafter at the hospital. His wife escaped with minor injuries -- physically speaking.